A request

This is a requested post by Mr. Swan. He told me (after an amazing event), "Blake, write a blog post about this!". So I'll summarize what happened, and maybe incorporate a bit of my essay in this.

So...yesterday was Halloween. I woke up early in the morning to cover myself in green skin paint, and hadn't gotten much sleep. So, I venture off to school with green skin and clothes that resemble Marshall Lee from Adventure Time. Well, I was extremely tired, and was only half awake during the horrible history hour. Well, to put it simply, I half dozed off to a magic land where strange people aren't trying to solve crosswords in a last minute attempt to study for history. The background music was perfect music for relaxation, and my already heavy eyes were falling. So yeah, of course I'm going to sleep.
Well, after I awakened from this wonderful world of fun, a large man towered over me. "One millliiiooonn years, Dungeon!" he declared. Well, I was still half asleep, so this wasn't horrible news to me yet. I just kept calm and carried on.
Well, today I had to pay. I walked down a dark, rotten corridor into a strange room that I'd never seen before. Inside of this was a nice lady that I'd seen in the front office. She always complimented my brilliant smile, although it's never actually sincere. This time, she directed me to the horrible board where I had to scribble my information onto a structured sheet of paper labeled "detention". On it already were names of offenders who...well...didn't fall asleep. They got in fights or assaulted a staff member. These people actually did something that could lower the reputation of this place. Nothing like dozing off in the first class of the day.

I was instructed to give them my iPod and pick up an excuse for an essay prompt. Although I couldn't listen to any Pink Floyd or Return to Forever, this experience was still going to be fun. I mean, the essay was a joke. "Write a response addressing your mistakes and any changes that need to be made to prevent incidences like them". Except, well, it said that in something a non-English speaker could understand. Apparently everyone who goes in this room needs a bit less elegance in their writing.
So, I put pen to paper and started writing something along the lines of,

"No one should ever dare to take even the smallest rest in the precious hour of historical education. Of course, the only way to solve this is to get to the root of the problem. This mistake took up less than .000000003% (based on the life span of an average American) of my life, and naturally a person like me wouldn't especially react to such an instance. However, eliminating the problem will take a younger generation. If we teach younger tykes that taking a momentary mental departure from any classroom is punishable by any means, then this chaotic world's problems may cease to exist."
Something like that.
Well, I guess 1.5 pages is extremely long for half an hour of writing. Especially when I could be gaining my energy back by digesting the lunch that I missed because of that. Oh well.

Oh yeah, Mr. Swan decided to barge in the room while I was writing my essay, take a seat next to me, and eat his obnoxiously loud apple. I guess I should've referenced him earlier.

Well, I calculated how long my action of dozing off and its punishment would take out of my life. Sorry that this is the only picture... Writing on my iPod.